A Florida man took a swan paddle boat for a joyride to be with the majestic birds — because they don’t judge him, according to reports.
Keith Thurston, 36, told police he was high on drugs when he grabbed the boat and took it out on Lake Eola in Orlando about 4 a.m. Friday, but ended up stranded on a fountain in the middle of the lake.
Police found the shivering birdbrain sitting on the fountain, wearing a life vest and shorts, screaming for help, the Orlando Weekly reported, citing a police report.
“Before Thurston was transported he explained he ingested a large quantity of Molly (MDMA) and wanted to be with the swans because they didn’t judge him,” said the incident report. “He stated he took the swan boat out onto the lake to be with the swans, and paddled it to the fountain.”
Thurston, who stole the rental swan boat after hours, said he got stuck on the fountain after he forgot to tie the boat up and it drifted away, according to the report.
Charges against Thurston were pending, according to the Orlando Sentinel.