‘Sometimes the hardest decisions are the right ones’: Alan Carr’s alcoholic husband Paul Drayton breaks his silence and reveals he has checked himself into rehab as couple announce they are separating after 13 years

•  A spokesperson for the comedian, 45, made the announcement on Friday, revealing the couple had ‘jointly and amicably made the difficult decision’
• The couple married in California in 2018 in a ceremony officiated by Carr’s close friend Adele
•  In December Paul, 50, revealed he needed a life saving operation before Christmas due to having a chronic subdural hematoma
• A court case in November saw Paul plead guilty at Brighton Magistrates to a drink-driving charge 
• Paul has a history of alcoholism and went into rehab in 2018
•  In August 2020, Alan revealed lockdown had tempted his teetotal husband to start drinking again 

Alan Carr and his husband Paul Drayton are separating after 13 years together and three years of marriage.

A spokesperson for the comedian, 45, made the announcement on Friday, revealing the couple had ‘jointly and amicably made the difficult decision to divorce’.

Paul, 50, then announced on Instagram that he is currently in rehab for alcoholism, after a ‘challenging couple of years’ which saw him plead guilty last November to a drink-driving charge. 

Split: Alan Carr and his husband Paul Drayton are separating after 13 years together and three years of marriage (Paul and Alan pictured in 2019) 

In a statement to the PA news agency on Friday, the spokesperson said: ‘After 13 years as a couple and three years of marriage, Alan Carr and Paul Drayton would like to announce they are separating.

‘They have jointly and amicably made the difficult decision to divorce and go their separate ways. We request that their privacy is respected at this sensitive time.’

Paul shared his own statement on Instagram, explaining that he ‘proactively’ checked himself into rehab at the beginning of the year to seek help for his ongoing battle with alcoholism. 

‘It is with great sadness that I share the news that Alan and I have jointly decided to end our marriage. This decision has been very difficult for us both and we part ways with great memories and continued love and friendship for each other as we go our separate ways,’ Paul wrote under a sunset photo with a heart drawn on top.

‘Sobriety’: Paul shared his own statement on Instagram, explaining that he ‘proactively’ checked himself into rehab at the beginning of 2022 to seek help for  alcoholism

‘As part of my own journey, I proactively checked myself into a rehabilitation facility at the turn of the new year in order to get the help and support I need during this challenging time.’

‘This was not an easy step to take, but I know it is the right one going forward. These last couple of years have been challenging to say the least, as they have been for so many others. But I remain deeply committed to my journey of sobriety and strength.

‘We ask for privacy during this challenging time, but I thank you all for your kindness and support. Peace and love.’ He ended the post by sharing the hashtags: ‘#sobriety #sometimesthehardestdecisionsaretherightones #newchapters #looktothefuture.’

A court case in November saw Paul plead guilty at Brighton Magistrates to a drink-driving charge after getting behind the wheel while four times over the legal limit.

He was warned that he faces jail by a judge who told him it was a ‘miracle’ no one was killed.

Charge: Paul was accused of drink-driving in November and admitted his guilt after initially denying the charge at Brighton Magistrates’ Court

Paul was accused of drink-driving after he reversed into a police car, narrowly missing a mother pushing a pram, while in his Mitsubishi 4×4 in West Sussex, just three miles from the £2.7 million home he shares with Alan.

Originally, he denied the charge but admitted his guilt at Brighton Magistrates’ Court. The case has been adjourned for sentencing.

Paul was charged with driving with 153mcg of alcohol in 100ml of breath – well over the limit of 35mcg – though he initially claimed the breathalyser machine was not working properly. 

District Judge Amanda Kelly told Paul: ‘The starting point for this offence is a 12 week prison sentence and that was for somebody with less alcohol and who didn’t hit a police car.

‘I will order a pre-sentence report but the overwhelming likelihood is you will be going to prison.

The judge continued: ‘You have endangered the public by driving around in that state. It is an absolute miracle you are here to day and have not killed or maimed another member of the public.  

‘You are now disqualified from driving from today. Be as honest and open with probation as you can be, but custody is likely.’

 13 years together: The couple married in January 2018, with Alan’s close friend Adele officiating the ceremony

Wedding: The wedding, which Adele paid for, took place at the singer’s California home and the star got ordained for the occasion, sharing a photo of herself in front of a huge flower wall

In August 2021 Paul shared a photo of himself with a black eye on Instagram and told a fan ‘we had a bad row,’ before removing it within an hour.

The next day he insisted the comedian ‘has never hit me,’ writing on social media: ‘I’m feeling very fragile at the minute and would like to say that Alan would not and has never hit me. And I’m devastated that he has to deal with this today.’ 

Alan confirmed in a statement shortly after his husband posted the black eye image the injury was a result of him ‘being back on the wagon’ and he had not been involved in the incident. 

Alan said he was trying to get his husband the ‘help he needs’ after he started drinking again.

The comedian told how his significant other ‘fell off the wagon’ while Alan was away filming in Wales, but that he was working with Paul to help him.

The chat show host said: ‘While I was away filming on location the past few weeks, Paul fell off the wagon and started drinking again. When I arrived back home from Wales, Paul was covered in scratches and bruises from a drinking binge.

Opening up: In December Paul, 50, revealed he needed a life saving operation before Christmas due to having a chronic subdural hematoma

Rehab stints, lockdown temptations and a drink-drive charge: Paul Drayton’s battle with alcohol

2016 

Alan speaks out on Paul’s battle with booze for the first time, writing in his book Alanatomy that he began drinking more heavily after injuring his back in 2015. 

Paul and Alan in November 2018 following Paul’s rehab stint earlier that year

‘It’s horrible when you realise how bad it’s got. You’re watching someone kill themselves,’ the star writes.

‘I wanted to leave him. It’s the lies that get you – the, ‘Oh I’ll never drink again’. And then you go out, realise you’ve forgotten your car keys, go back and… [Paul would be drinking.]

‘I couldn’t cope, because when I left the house, I didn’t know if he was going to have a fall, or put something on the hob and fall asleep. He was grey and shuffling around. It was like watching someone die.’

January 2018

Shortly after Alan and Paul return from their Mexico honeymoon, Paul checks himself into a rehab facility. 

March 30 2020

Paul reveals he has gone 650 days without having a drink, posting on Instagram at the beginning of the first coronavirus lockdown: ‘Believe me I’m really tempted to have a few. Even if it’s Just to alleviate the bloody boredom! I wake up the next day so grateful I didn’t.’

August 2020 

Alan reveals lockdown has tempted his teetotal husband to start drinking again. ‘It’s been tough for Paul during lockdown. He’s been saying, ”Oh, shall we get a bottle?” and I say, ”No, we’re not getting any rosé wine in”. He’s been so good and I’m so proud of him,’the comedian says.

August 2021 

Drayton pictured at his court hearing dor drink-driving in November 2021

Paul shares a photo of himself with a black eye on Instagram and tells a fan ‘we had a bad row,’ before removing it within an hour.

The next day he insists Alan ‘has never hit me,’ writing on social media: ‘I’m feeling very fragile at the minute and would like to say that Alan would not and has never hit me. And I’m devastated that he has to deal with this today.’ 

Alan confirms in a statement shortly after his husband posted the black eye image the injury was a result of him ‘being back on the wagon’. 

September 2021  

Alan explains that he had given up alcohol to help his husband stay sober,  revealing he had six months off that spanned Christmas and New Year but he had since returned to drinking.

‘It was the worst f****ing Christmas I’ve ever had. And my mother didn’t help by offering him a Bailey’s and going: ‘It’s only Bailey’s – what’s the worst that can happen!” Alan says of Paul.

November 2021

Paul pleads guilty at Brighton Magistrates to a drink-driving charge after getting behind the wheel while four times over the legal limit. He is warned that he faces jail by a judge who tells him it was a ‘miracle’ no one was killed.

Paul was accused of drink-driving after he reversed into a police car, narrowly missing a mother pushing a pram, while in his Mitsubishi 4×4 in West Sussex, just three miles from the £2.7 million home he shares with Alan.

Originally, he denied the charge. 

Paul shares a post on NYD 2022 admitting 2021 had been full of ‘ups and downs’

January 1 2022

Paul shares a lengthy Instagram post on January 1, admitting 2021 had been full of ‘ups and downs’ as he apologises for hurting his loved ones. Paul says he takes ‘full responsibility for my actions and am sorry for any hurt I’ve caused at times when I was not myself’.

 January 21 2022

The couple confirm they have separated and are divorcing after 13 years together. Paul shares his own statement on Instagram explaining that he checked himself into rehab at the beginning of the year ‘in order to get the help and support I need during this challenging time.’

 

‘We are now working together to get the help he needs to get better which is our number one priority right now.’ 

An insider has told MailOnline that the couple’s relationship never recovered after the incident.

The funnyman believed Paul’s Instagram post risked ruining his career and close friends of the chat show host feel that was the ‘final straw’ in their rocky relationship which strained due to Paul’s booze problems.

Alan is now being comforted by close friend Adele, whom he supported during her high-profile divorce from Simon Konecki.

A pal said: ‘Alan knew Paul’s claim was potentially career threatening and could have had disastrous consequences.

‘They managed to correct the situation, leaving Alan’s reputation intact, but it could have been so much worse and the final straw in a line of issues.

‘Alan has been leaning on Adele during hard times, like he was there for her during her marriage break up. It’s sad for everyone involved but the time was right to split. 

Close: Alan is now being comforted by close friend Adele, whom he supported during her high-profile divorce from Simon Konecki, they have been friends since the singer was 19

Alan and Paul spent the pandemic isolating together on their farm outside London, with Alan admitting that lockdown had been ‘tough’ for his husband.

The couple married in January 2018, with Alan’s close friend Adele officiating the ceremony. The wedding, which Adele also paid for, took place at the singer’s California home. 

Speaking to The One Show shortly after the nuptials, Alan revealed the singer, who he has known since she was 19, got ordained so that she could perform the marriage itself.

Alan confessed: ‘Yeah, [it was] in January. We got married in Adele’s back garden, in LA. I’m not giving you any postcodes! She’s known me and Paul for ages.

‘She said: ‘I want to do your special day. I want to do everything’. She got ordained and she married us. She is the kindest, most sweetest. She flew us to Vegas to see Celine Dion sing. She [Adele] sang my first dance. It was the best day of my life.’

‘It was lovely. I just want to tell everyone. She won’t say because she’s so private. Flowers, three-course meal, she just planned it all. It was the best day of our life.’ 

Alan and party planner Paul tied the knot after ten years of romance and went on to honeymoon in Los Cabos in Mexico. 

‘Sobriety’: Paul shared a lengthy Instagram post on January 1, admitting 2021 had been full of ‘ups and downs’ as he apologised for hurting his loved ones

Ups and downs: Paul said he took ‘responsibility for my actions and am sorry for any hurt I’ve caused at times when I was not myself’

Back in 2016, the couple were on holiday in Indonesia when Paul popped the question. Alan thought he had had a dental accident while eating his dessert – only to reveal his beau had hidden an engagement ring in the pudding. 

Speaking to The Sun Alan recalled: ‘I went to the toilet and came out to eat dessert… I was like, ‘Oh my God, a filling’s come out, just my luck on holiday.’ I pull it out and it’s this ring, and then the man on the organ starts singing Can You Feel The Love Tonight.’

‘Then the chef, all the staff came out, and the manager, and sang  but they didn’t know the next lyric, so they just sang, ‘Can you feel the love tonight? Can you feel the love tonight?’ So it was my idea of hell! But of course I said yes.’

Alan has spoken about supporting Paul through his battle with alcoholism, writing about the struggles in his 2016 book ALANATOMY.

The Chatty Man star explained that his husband began drinking more heavily after injuring his back in 2015.  ‘It’s horrible when you realise how bad it’s got. You’re watching someone kill themselves,’ he wrote at the time.

‘I wanted to leave him. It’s the lies that get you – the, ‘Oh I’ll never drink again’. And then you go out, realise you’ve forgotten your car keys, go back and… [Paul would be drinking.]

‘I couldn’t cope, because when I left the house, I didn’t know if he was going to have a fall, or put something on the hob and fall asleep. He was grey and shuffling around. It was like watching someone die.’.

He said: ‘I want to be there for him because he’s the best thing that’s happened to me and I’ve got to support him and everything.’ 

Paul has a long history of alcoholism and went into rehab in 2018, the year he married Carr. 

Love: Alan last shared an Instagram photo with Paul in June 2021 to mark the 13th  anniversary of when they met 

Alan told the Kelly Hoppen podcast in August 2020: ‘It’s been tough for Paul during lockdown. He’s been saying, ”Oh, shall we get a bottle?” and I say, ”No, we’re not getting any rosé wine in”. He’s been so good and I’m so proud of him.’

The Chatty Man host went alcohol free to support his husband but has since started drinking again. He said: ‘I like eating and drinking, but it was ridiculous before – we were cracking open a bottle of rosé because it was a Monday.

‘We were out of control. It was a laugh, but looking at Paul, sometimes the party has to stop.’

Back in 2016, Alan admitted he had been ‘neglecting’ his relationship with Paul due to his busy work schedule, expaining: ‘To be honest, it was a tough year for my Paul last year. He had a few issues with alcohol, and a lot of the time that was because I was away so much. I was out there, working hard, earning the money, and I neglected my personal life, really, so I feel a little bit to blame for that.’  

Celeb friends: Paul shared a photo of the two enjoying a dinner at their friend Amanda Holden’s house in July 2021, along with David Walliams, Simon Cowell and Lauren Silverman

Feeling good: Alan shared an Instagram photo on Wednesday looking in good spirits

What is a chronic subdural hematoma (SDH)?

A subdural haematoma occurs when a blood vessel in the space between the skull and the brain (the subdural space) is damaged.

Blood escapes from the blood vessel, leading to the formation of a blood clot (haematoma) that places pressure on the brain and damages it.

Head injuries that cause subdural haematomas are often severe, such as those from a car crash, fall or violent assault.

But minor bumps to the head can also lead to a subdural haematoma in a few cases.

A minor head injury is more likely to lead to a subdural haematoma if you’re over 60, taking anticoagulant (‘blood-thinning’) medicine or have a history of alcohol misuse.

Source – NHS 

 

In the same 2016 One Show interview, Alan, who has remained relatively private about his relationship over the years said he was starting to open up more: ‘My Paul shows up in some of the jokes in this new show, actually, which he’s not too chuffed about, but my job is what allows him to be a kept man, so he has to learn to deal with the exposure… Actually, no. That’s not fair,’ he said. 

In December, Paul revealed he needed a life saving operation before Christmas due to having a chronic subdural hematoma, sustained during a horse riding accident.

Paul explained that he would be ‘offline for a while’ following the news that he would need emergency surgery, as he opened up on the procedure in a video.

The problem was identified after Paul booked an appointment with his doctor due to falling from a horse and his head feeling not ‘right’. 

A chronic subdural hematoma (SDH) is a collection of blood on the brain’s surface, under the outer covering of the brain. 

Taking to social media Paul explained: ‘I have a chronic subdural hematoma. They [surgeons] have to drill two small holes to drain it. Hopefully in the next few days.’

He said: ‘I won’t be on here for a while but will read all your messages as it gives me comfort and peace’ before thanking his followers for their ‘messages and love’.

Later in the day  Paul took to Instagram to address his followers in a series of videos posted to his Story he said: 

‘I’m feeling very sorry for myself but also feeling very guilty as I know a lot of you are going through a lot.’ 

He added: ‘I’m feeling broken and I am trying not to cry whilst recording these messages.

‘But, I hope you’re all well and that we can look forward to a better 2022.’ 

Struggles: Alan has spoken about supporting Paul through his battle with alcoholism, writing about the struggles in his 2016 book ALANATOMY (pictured together in 2012)

Paul shared a lengthy Instagram post on January 1, admitting 2021 had been full of ‘ups and downs’ as he apologised for hurting his loved ones.

‘This year has been full of ups and downs for me. I’d like to thank you all for the love and support you have shown me,’ he wrote. ‘Over the last few months I’ve taken steps to prioritise my recovery. This is a life-long journey, but it is one I’m deeply committed to.’

‘I take responsibility for my actions and am sorry for any hurt I’ve caused at times when I was not myself. I am so grateful for the continued support of my family, extended family, friends who are like family, and you.’ 

Keeping busy with work: Alan hosted his first Royal Variety Performance in December 

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