Mena Suvari is opening up about the highs — and lows — of motherhood.

Over a year and a half after giving birth to her son Christopher, the 43-year-old is detailing the toll postpartum depression has, and continues, to take on her. During Sunday’s installment of Rachel Bilson‘s Broad Ideas podcast, the American Pie alum confessed to being tired of “sugarcoating” the impact childbirth can have on one’s mental health, revealing: 

“I struggle with postpartum every day. I’m just getting my hormones tested next month, so yeah, it’s all very real. I deal with this every day.”

We appreciate how she’s willing to keep things real.

Mena and her husband Michael Hope, with whom she tied the knot in 2018, welcomed their baby boy last April in an unfortunately less-than-ideal birth… The Sugar & Spice star explained after nearly 48 hours (!!!!), “with an epidural they had to redo again,” the couple were forced to give up on their planned natural water birth at home. Instead, the momma had to undergo a C-section. She admitted that still bothers her: 

“I still suffer from that, and I’m entitled to those emotions. We as mothers are entitled to those emotions and just because I have a beautiful baby who’s perfectly healthy, my husband’s wonderful, and we made it out of the hospital, I still feel like I’m allowed to hold some space for being sad over not having that birth.”

She continued:

“I just want to make that area a little bit bigger for people. Because it’s not fair to just be like, ‘But you’re fine, right? But you didn’t die? But your baby’s OK?”

Overall, though, the American Beauty actress enjoyed her pregnancy, noting:

“I had a great pregnancy, everything was wonderful. I feel very lucky for all of that.”

However, when it comes to being a mother, finding a balance between being present for her little boy and giving herself necessary alone time has been a bit of a challenge. Mena recalled in one specific instance: 

“I remember sitting on our balcony saying, ‘I have to get out of the house. I have to get out of the house.’ My husband, he said, ‘You can go. You can go for a walk.’ But I didn’t think I could.”

She added:

“I was going crazy. I was like, ‘I have to do something for myself but I can’t go.’ I had to learn .”

Striking that balance is an ongoing challenge. As she put it: 

“I still struggle with that. I don’t need to be in face 24/7 to raise a good being because of my fears. It’s a lot of work.”

She later admitted to “wishing” she didn’t have those feelings, but overall noted: 

“I feel really lucky, and it’s just wild. It truly feels like the most important thing that I will ever do in my life. Like, nothing else matters. Everything just changes in your life. He’ll come first.”

Motherhood comes with a lot of ups and downs, but we’re so happy to see Mena settling in and not giving up, not matter how bad the debilitating condition of postpartum depression affects her. Strong momma! And opening up about it on a podcast surely helps others, too!

What are your thoughts, Perezcious readers? Let us know in the comments down below!

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