When it comes to celebrity marriages, Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are the very definition of relationship goals. But that’s not to say the star couple’s pairing is without its faults: in fact, they strive to work through their problems together. While the couple has been happily married for quite some time, the reason they’re able to stay that way is because they communicate consistently and openly.
The two have shared some of the tactics they use to keep that communication going. Here are some tips from them on how they keep their marriage strong.
They don’t walk away from a fight
Insider provided an overview of some of the rules the couple lives by. One of those, outlined by Bell, was to never walk away during a fight. Often when couples argue, it can be tempting to simply storm out and not confront the root of the problem.
Bell said she tries not to do this. She said she discovered during their first year of marriage that while walking out on a fight can seem like a good thing to do in the short-term, over the long haul it didn’t help anyone:
“We’d get in a fight — because we would fight, a lot — and I’d, like, yell something then slam the bedroom door, then I’d slam the front door, then I’d get in my car and then I’d skid out the driveway, and then I would sit around the corner in my car. And it felt so good, and I realized how incredibly toxic it was only after he pointed it out.”
Three months into their pairing, Shepard told Bell she could not walk out on a fight, implying that he wanted to talk to her rather than avoid the problem.
They treat their relationship like a privilege
It can be easy to lose sight of the fact that having a relationship – particularly a strong one – is a privilege. But Bell made sure to denote that this was the case for her and Shepard. On Valentine’s Day in 2018, Bell took to Instagram to post some advice as it related to her marriage.
“In 10 years, when the dopamine has waned, remember: Life is a crazy ride…It’s a privilege to go through it with a partner.”
This advice is about keeping a relationship in perspective. Yes, the duo likely have their trials and tribulations, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t lucky to have one another. Rather than focusing on the tough times, Bell likes to realize how lucky both she and Shepard are to have each other in their lives.
Both have their own interests
It can be common for couples to become so intertwined that they spend the majority of their time together. Sometimes this can be a good thing, as it gives these couples more of an opportunity to bond and get to know each other. But there is such a thing as too much of a good thing – and Shepard and Bell have realized this fact.
In Bell’s Instagram post, she noted that it’s important for couples to respect each other’s “separateness,” adding, “Rejoice in what makes the other person happy, and allow them their individual interests.”
Shepard and Bell may seem like a package deal after years of seeing them interviewed together, but the fact is they are different people that have their own interests. By allowing themselves to have their own identities separate from their spouse, they strengthen the bond they already have.
Bell and Shepard aren’t perfect and they don’t have a perfect marriage – no one does. But by establishing boundaries, communicating, and showing gratitude, it’s clear they’re able to navigate marriage easier than if they didn’t have these types of guidelines in place.
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