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If something's going to get in the way of an erection, it might as well be a much older, more interesting erection.
And that's exactly what happened when archaeologists found a 3,000 year old stone penis during a construction site assessment.
When experts uncovered the 21-inch statue, complete with veins and all, they thought it belonged to a burial site.
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However, after closer examination, they concluded the girthy member was more likely used by a cult in bloody rituals.
The discovery was made in a wooded area at a construction site in Rollsbo, near Gothenburg, Sweden, back in 2019.
Archaeologists' theory that the statue was the headstone of a Bronze Age grave was dismissed after they found animal bones nearby.
A lack of human bones made their initial assumption unlikely.
Instead, they believe the stone todger, thought to date back to the Bronze Age, between 1800 and 500 BC, was used in blood sacrifices offered to the Pagan fertility gods.
Archaeologist Gisela Ängeby told local media: “When we excavated the rocks, we saw something that deviated from everything else. It was on the ground but had been raised in the past.
“It has a distinct phallus shape. I thought when I came across it that, ‘Oh my god, it can't be true’.
“There was a 52cm-long stone shaped like a penis.
“I showed the picture to colleagues and there is no discussion, it has a very penis-like shape.”
According to experts, the stone may have been phallic-shaped naturally – but the design was later reinforced.
An explanation from archaeological consultancy firm The Archaeologists said: “Standing stones in the middle of stone paving are not uncommon. But just the way it is designed is a little special.
“It is partially weather and then carved. And that’s how the shape has been reinforced.
“I believe that in connection with the erection, it was used to offer sacrifices, for example within the framework of a fertility cult."
"The stone was hidden under a stone packing and originally the archaeologists thought it was a Bronze Age grave."
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While it is rare to find one designed to look so realistic, penis-shaped objects are fairly common archaeological discoveries.
A lucky charm shaped as an erect penis and testicles — designed to ward off evil — has been estimated to be dated from 100AD.
It was discovered, completely accidentally, by divers in south-east Spain.
- Cults
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